I am a middle child, and growing up, I fit the typical description of a middle child perfectly, for better and for worse. I found myself looking at something that my brother or sister got, whether a gift or after-school treats, and thinking, "That's not fair!" I also deserved a present or treat like my sibling got. Each time this happened, I overreacted. I complained. I said and did unkind things. In other words, I overreacted. After my overreaction, I came to regret my behavior when I learned that my parents had certainly not forgotten me. They always provided something special for me, too. I had let my jealousy and comparison cause me to think I had been left out or forgotten, even though every time my parents remembered me, too. Comparison and envy do that, don’t they? They cause us to overreact to a situation, thinking we have been forgotten or even mistreated compared to someone else when, in reality, God has taken care of us and provided for us, too.
We read in James 3 that comparison and jealousy, or envy, cause us to overreact. Here is what James writes in this passage of Scripture: "Jealousy and selfishness are not God’s kind of wisdom. Such things are earthly, unspiritual, and demonic” (verse 15). These are strong words to describe jealousy. Although strong, these words are, of course, valid. Jealousy is earthy. It is rooted in this world and the things of this world. It is also unspiritual. It is not focused on God and His kingdom. Finally, it is demonic. That means not only is it not of God, but it actively fights against God and His kingdom. James continued writing, “For wherever there is jealousy and selfish ambition, there you will find disorder and evil of every kind” (verse 16). Indeed, jealousy causes us to overreact and cause all kinds of disruption and disorder that we will later regret.
Instead of living a life of jealousy and disruption, we are called to be peacemakers. Part of being a peacemaker means that we stop comparing what God has given us and being at peace with what He has given us. What is the result of peacemaking? James explains that “those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of righteousness” (verse 18). May we seek to be peacemakers instead of envious people and “reap a harvest of righteousness” in return.
Take some time to think about what it means to be a peacemaker. Make a list of ways you would expect a peacemaker to behave. Then, commit to living like a peacemaker. When you feel tempted to compare and feel jealous, shift your mindset and seek to be a peacemaker instead of someone who is envious. Ask God to help you as you seek to live this way.
Dear brothers and sisters, not many of you should become teachers in the church, for we who teach will be judged more strictly. 2 Indeed, we all make many mistakes. For if we could control our tongues, we would be perfect and could also control ourselves in every other way.
3 We can make a large horse go wherever we want by means of a small bit in its mouth. 4 And a small rudder makes a huge ship turn wherever the pilot chooses to go, even though the winds are strong. 5 In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches.
But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. 6 And among all the parts of the body, the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself.
7 People can tame all kinds of animals, birds, reptiles, and fish, 8 but no one can tame the tongue. It is restless and evil, full of deadly poison. 9 Sometimes it praises our Lord and Father, and sometimes it curses those who have been made in the image of God. 10 And so blessing and cursing come pouring out of the same mouth. Surely, my brothers and sisters, this is not right! 11 Does a spring of water bubble out with both fresh water and bitter water? 12 Does a fig tree produce olives, or a grapevine produce figs? No, and you can’t draw fresh water from a salty spring.
13 If you are wise and understand God’s ways, prove it by living an honorable life, doing good works with the humility that comes from wisdom. 14 But if you are bitterly jealous and there is selfish ambition in your heart, don’t cover up the truth with boasting and lying. 15 For jealousy and selfishness are not God’s kind of wisdom. Such things are earthly, unspiritual, and demonic. 16 For wherever there is jealousy and selfish ambition, there you will find disorder and evil of every kind.
17 But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and the fruit of good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere. 18 And those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of righteousness.
