DEVOTIONAL
We are currently in a series called Red Light Green Light where we are figuring out the things that need to stop in 2023 and the things that need a full green light in our lives. This weekend we talked about some relationships that we need to make sure we have this year.
We know we need:
The beautiful thing is, you can find at least ⅔ of those relationships right here in your small group. So just by being here, you guys are ahead of the game!
I think you all know how important these relationships are, so instead of talking more about why we need those relationships, I want to talk about what we should be doing with these relationships. How do we get the most out of our small group?
Be consistent.
Hebrews 10:25 says"And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near."
The author of Hebrews here is writing to Jewish Christians and encouraging them to persevere. They were under a lot of persecution, and it would have been very tempting for them to just give up on meeting with their church community. But this author says “Do not do that. Don’t quit meeting together.” They needed each other, just like we do.
You all go through a lot every week. You have tests and family and friend drama. Some of you deal with bullies, new relationships starting and ending, homework, jobs, and more. I could keep going because I know that you have so much going on. On top of that, you're trying to develop your relationship with God. You are trying to make time to read your Bible and pray and learn, and you are probably dealing with shame while you try to do these things because you are not perfect in your relationship with God. I don’t know if you have noticed this feeling before, but I find when I am overwhelmed, or sad, or really ashamed. I usually don’t want to go talk to people. I try to come up with every excuse in the book to get out of my small group when I am feeling that way. I bet you get that way too. But we have to remember the words of the author of Hebrews. We have to remember that we need each other. We aren’t in a small group just for moments when life is good. We are in small groups so that when life falls apart we have someone to lean on. We are in a small group so we can have people praying for us and helping us follow Jesus every day, not just on the good days.
So when you are tempted to stay home and avoid people. Remember every valuable relationship is one you have to fight for. So fight those feelings and show up. Be here and be present in your group. You need them and they need you.
Be real.
James 5:16 says,
"Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results."
Your small group leader is here every week because they care about you and want to see you grow. They know the power and freedom that comes from being in a healthy small group. They know the benefits of being real and honest about what you're going through. So guess what, your small group leader is going to ask you some challenging questions. They are going to encourage you to open up more. Because they know that in middle and high school, it is really easy to feel alone and feel like you need to hide behind a mask all the time. But the path to freedom from your sins is to confess them. The path to not feeling so alone is to say your fears out loud.
A researcher named Brene Brown said “Vulnerability is the core, the heart, the center, of meaningful human experiences.” In other words, “We must be known in order to be healthy”
You guys want to live differently in 2023? Do you want to be more emotionally and mentally healthy then you have ever been? Be vulnerable. But remember there is a difference between being real and complaining. Being real is saying “This is what I am going through, will you pray for me and support me as I go through this?” complaining is saying “I am going through this, and I can’t believe this is happening, and why is my life so terrible?” Don’t be a complainer. Be real and be ready to openly share what is going on, but do not complain about it.
Support each other.
If everyone in your small group takes this seriously, you will start to hear a lot more about the struggles they are going through. It is not enough to nod along and say you’ll pray for them. Be there for your friends. Pray for them in the moment. Don’t wait til you get home. Check on them throughout the week, and ask how you can support them. You all know how it feels to deal with your problems alone. Let’s be the kind of people that our friends can count on. If someone opens up in your group, be ready to support them and walk with them through the struggle.
Look at Galatians.6:2 2,
"Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ. When we help each other and walk with them through their problems, we are obeying Christ."
If we can do these three things well, our lives will be transformed in the next year by our community. But we have to put in the work. Are you willing to work hard to have these transformed relationships?
BREAK THE ICE
Let’s spend some time getting to know each other even better. Play two truths and a lie. Go around the circle and have everyone say two things that are true about themselves and one thing that is a lie. Then, have the rest of the group guess which one is the lie.
SMALL GROUP QUESTIONS
1. Our student pastor gave us three keys to a healthy small group. What were they?
2. Out of those three keys to a healthy group, which one do you feel like you struggle with the most: being consistent, being real, or supporting each other?
3. What gets in the way of you being consistent in this small group? (Some students are inconsistent because of sports and school obligations, that is ok! This question is geared towards the student who finds themselves missing small group often because they make excuses.)
a. Is there anything we can do to help you fight that and be more consistent with our group?
b.What are the benefits of us being consistently here?
4. What makes it difficult for some of us to be real? What fears are stopping you from opening up?
a. Read James 5:16. What is at stake when we aren’t vulnerable?
James 5:16
16 Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.
b. What can we do as a group to help each other feel safe to open up?
5. How do you think we are doing as a group supporting each other? Why?
a. What makes you feel heard and supported?
b. How can we replicate those things as a group?
MOVING FORWARD
Let’s take time now to practice being vulnerable.. Ask everyone to write down a prayer request or something they are going through. Pray together as a group over these things. Then, take it a step further and assign certain members of the group to pray about these requests this week. This is also a great time to create a group chat for your group if you haven’t already.
©2026 Sagebrush Church
