Joy Killer #2: Being Ungrateful (Be Thankful)
Another joy killer is being ungrateful. I'm sure you know by now that every parent wants their child to have a grateful heart, right? That's why after you are given something, if you forget to say "Thank you," they will remind you, so you don't look like a moron. Parents prompt their children by saying, "What do you say?"
John Ortberg writes that he prompted his kids in this way. "What do you say to the nice man? What do you say to Aunt Eva for her Velveeta, Spam, and lima bean casserole?"
All kids know that this really isn't a question. Parents aren't looking for information here. They would have been surprised if I had said, "Aunt Eva, what in the name of heaven were you thinking? Aunt Eva, you should not be allowed to prepare meals for human beings. Someone should put you away!"
John's parents would have been very surprised if he had said that. You are supposed to say "thank you."
Why do parents do this? They have this hope that their children will live with grateful hearts and become grateful people because the opposite of having a grateful heart is to have a complaining and judgmental heart. That kind of heart reflects that the person takes things for granted and lives with a sense of entitlement.
I can't even tell you the number of people I have met in my life that have no joy inside of them because nothing in their life is ever good enough. That is not to say that they don't have a great life. Most joyless people have a great life; they just can't see it for themselves. All they can focus on is what they don't have, rather than focusing on what they do have.
If you want the joy sucked right out of your life, ignore all the amazing gifts God has given to you. Ignore the fact that God still has you alive. Ignore the fact that you are gifted and one of a kind, and no one can do what God has called you to do. You have a purpose for your life. Ignore that as well.
Ignore the fact that you have a family that loves you, a roof over your head, and food in your belly. Ignore the fact that you have a Savior who died for your sins. Ignore all the good things in your life, and just focus on what is not going right, and you will be a miserable person.
The problem I have seen for so many people is they say they are thankful and then throw a "but" at the end of a thank you. Thank you, Lord, for friends, but I wish I had more. I'm grateful for my day, but I wish I weren't so bored. How about this one? I'm thankful for my car; I just wish it was a newer model, or I'm thankful for my room, but I wish it were bigger.
Do you live with an ungrateful heart or a grateful heart? When a person is never satisfied with what they have, they will never find the joy they are looking for. Paul said in Philippians 4:11-13
"I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through Him who gives me strength."
When a person is always looking to the next purchase, the next acquisition, the next whatever, when they never stop to look around and see just how blessed and rich they really are, then an ungrateful spirit comes into their heart and into their soul, and robs them of joy.
1. What is the secret to contentment according to Paul in Philippians 4:11-13?
2. Write down five gifts that God has given you.
3. Is there an area of your life where you are “butting” God? Finish the following sentence. I’m thankful for ______________________ but_____________________.
4. Look up Philippians 2:14-15. What is the benefit of having a joyful spirit?
5. Don't be a spoiled brat. Be thankful and joyful for what you have, and stop putting so much focus on what you wish was different. If you get this right, you will be the most joyful person around.
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