Godly Friendships - Week 1, Day 3

Top Ten List (True Friend)

There seems to be a lot of confusion in our society today about friendships. What we sometimes forget is that friendships generally make or break us. As a result, we end up in relationships that aren’t healthy or good for us, and it messes our lives up. I personally have had people who I thought were my friends, but in time, I realized they actually never were my friends at all. As a result, I did a friendship study to see what the Bible has to say about it, and the Bible actually says a lot.

Below you will find the Top Ten Characteristics of a True Friend. Put these up somewhere in your room or in your school books as a constant reminder to you on what friendship is supposed to be about. Then occasionally evaluate your friendships with the top ten characteristics. Also, check to see how you are doing as a friend to them. Away we go.

Top Ten Characteristics of A True Friend:

1. A friend loves at all times. Proverbs 17:17.
This person is patient, kind, understanding, and not easily angered. Look up 1 Corinthians 13 to see an excellent description of what love is and isn’t. Someone who cares for you like I Corinthians 13 is a great friend. Hang on to that person.

2. A friend stands beside you no matter what. Proverbs 18:24.
Now that doesn’t mean your friend is always going to think that you have it all together and always make the right choices. Sometimes the greatest thing a friend can do is show you in private the weaknesses of your life and stand by your side and help you work it out. For instance, if a friend of yours starts messing with drugs or alcohol, you as a friend need to step in and help your friend get out of that mess. A true friend does whatever it takes to help another friend out because he has his friend’s best interest at heart.

3. A friend helps you to become more like Christ. Proverbs 27:17.
This is where you challenge each other in your relationships with God. You pray together, talk about spiritual things, and even study the Bible together. A friendship built on God is a friendship that will last.

4. A friend never talks behind your back. Proverbs 11:13.
They are trustworthy. If they have something to say about you, they say it to you and not to someone else. Nothing will destroy a friendship faster than gossiping or saying foolish stuff about a friend.

5. A friend encourages you and doesn’t put you down. Hebrews 3:13.
Friendships that belittle and put down the other is really no friendship at all. Friendships should be about building others up and never tearing another person down.

6. A friend is honest with you even when it hurts.
Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses. Proverbs 27:6. Basically, a friend is not afraid to tell you the truth even if it hurts. An enemy keeps telling you you’re all right when there is something in your life that could eventually destroy you. A friend isn’t afraid to get the right kind of help, even if it means getting parents or Student Pastors involved.

7. A friend keeps his word. Proverbs 11:13.
What he says, he does. His word is gold—bank on it. A friend realizes that his word is his bond, his commitment, and he never takes his words lightly.

8. A friend forgives unconditionally. Matthew 18:22.
He forgives and doesn’t bring the matter up again….ever. He doesn’t hold grudges, and he realizes people are human. We all make mistakes.

9. A friend makes time to be with you. Mark 1:35.
A person always makes time for what is important in their life. It’s the same way in friendships. You make time even if time is tough to find. They never leave you hanging, or at least they make a valiant effort.

10. A friend is willing to give up everything to help out his friend. 1 John 3:16.
No greater love is there than a man lay down his life for his friends. A friend would be willing to die for their friend if that’s what it takes.

Friendships, true friendships are hard to find. A wise man once said, “If you have one true friend, you are rich. Two or more, you are a millionaire.” What kind of friend are you? What kind of friends do you have?

Time Out

1. Which one of the ten characteristics do you need to work on the most?

2. Which one of the ten characteristics do you feel the strongest in?

3. Looking at the top ten list and thinking about your friendships, who would you say is your one or two best friends?

4. Out of the top ten characteristics, how many of these traits did you have?

5. Spend some time today thanking the Lord for being the ultimate friend. If you don’t believe me, look at John 15:15. True friends are hard to find. Don’t blow off the ultimate friend.