Remix: Student Devotionals

Godly Friendships - Week 3, Day 1

Don't Ever Talk Behind My Back (Gossip)

A friend is someone who brags on your strengths, covers your weaknesses, and never talks about you behind your back. Let's talk about gossip.

Have you ever been gossiped about? It is brutal, isn't it? People are talking about you behind your back, and they are saying all kinds of trash about you that isn't even true, and then you find out that the source of the gossip was your friend. Talk about getting stabbed in the back.

The only information you should be revealing to a third party is the type that passes the following criteria:The only information you should be revealing to a third party is the type that passes the following criteria: 

1. Is it true?

2. Is it helpful?

3. Is it inspiring?

4. Is it necessary to tell?

5. Is it kind? 

Do you have the other person's permission to share the story? The Bible says very clearly in Matthew 18:15 that if you have a problem with someone, you go to that person to work it out. You don't go to everyone else you know.

I know how it goes. You are sitting around with your friends, and you are bored, so you start talking about everyone else, and before you know it, you are gossiping. Don't fall into that trap. Make a pact with your friends that if they have something to say about you, they say it to you. You make the same deal with them.

Listen to me. Once you have broken trust in a friendship by talking about another person behind their back, that friendship will be very difficult to repair, and those are words you can never get back again.

A woman in the church despised her pastor. She loved to spread rumors and upset as many people as she could. One day she felt guilty about all the hurt she had caused, and she went to the pastor and asked him to forgive her. He did, but he asked her if she would do something for him. He asked her to buy a feather pillow and go to the town square. He said when you get there, rip the pillow apart and let all the feathers fly. Then come back a week from now, and we will talk some more.

She did exactly what the pastor asked her to do. She let out all the feathers from the pillow. A week later, she was back in the pastor's office. He said would you do me one more favor. She said anything, Pastor. He said, "Would you go back to the town square and retrieve all the feathers you released last week and bring them back." She said, "Pastor, that is impossible. They are long gone. There is no way I can bring those feathers back." He said, "So it is with the words you chose to use. Once they are out of our mouth, we can never collect them again."


Proverbs 21:9 says, "A gossip betrays a confidence, so avoid anyone who talks too much."

Think before you speak.

 

Time out

1. Look up Proverbs 26:20. Write the verse out below.

2. How did it make you feel when other people gossiped about you?

3. Have you ever lost a friendship because of gossip?

4. Are you a gossiper? Do you talk behind other people's backs, and if you do, what are you going to do about that?

5. If you really grabbed someone by the ear and dragged them over to the person they were talking about, what do you think would happen? What would people think of you? (They probably would realize that you are not a person who wants to have that drama in your life and that you are not the kind of person who will even listen to gossip. That's not a bad person to be, is it?)

6. One more verse. Look up Psalm 141:3. Make this verse your prayer today.